jueves, 21 de septiembre de 2017

Mi Jornada hacia la Vida, Día 1037, El Terremoto en México (lo que se ha vivido)




Éstas son algunas de las fotos que tomé el día del sismo.





Así se veía la Colonia Roma poco después del terremoto, no sabía en ese momento que no debíamos sacar los celulares debido a las fugas de gas, pero alcancé a tomar estas dos fotos antes de apartar el teléfono de la zona.

Apenas llegamos a la primera área afectada, el gas y el polvo inundaban el aire; la garganta me dolía debido a la respiración agitada por haberme estado moviendo en la bicicleta al punto del incidente y por estar corriendo de un lado al otro durante el sismo.

Los militares guiaban nuestras acciones conforme se coordinaban con protección civil para poder organizar a todas las personas que corríamos a ayudar. Las familias lloraban a sus seres queridos y algunas personas observaban desde la distancia.

Me costó algo de trabajo, pero finalmente logré conciliar el sueño tras los dos días de trabajo y hoy debo volver a mis labores diarias... Para estos momentos, los únicos que tienen autorización de entrar a la zona son los militares y el personal capacitado, quienes van a ingresar con la maquinaria pesada para terminar de remover los escombros... si quedó alguien vivo, después de 24 horas es sumamente difícil salvarlos, y claro que entiendo el punto de "mantener la esperanza" y "citar los casos del 85" de las personas que lograron sobrevivir tras estar varios días atrapadas. Sin embargo, la gran mayoría de las personas que logran ser rescatadas, aún dentro de los tiempos cruciales, no llegan al hospital o mueren apenas suben a la ambulancia. Y todo el esfuerzo, energía y trabajo empleado, simplemente retrasan la ayuda que se necesita en otros lugares... Estas fueron algunas de las palabras del jefe de Protección Civil, quien añadía por supuesto que en los Medios no se compartían estas cosas y deseaban mantener "la esperanza viva", para no desalentar a la población. El problema es que en realidad a través de los medios se le dió prioridad a zonas como la escuela Enrique Rebsamen, debido por supuesto a la situación de que se trataba de niños atrapados entre los escombros, pero esa atención obligó a los militares y al personal a permanecer en esos puntos, en lugar de distribuirlos por las zonas en donde de igual manera se necesitaban.

Y algunos podrán decir ante mis palabras: "A ti te habría gustado que corrieran a salvarte y que hicieran todo lo posible..."

Correcto, sin embargo, los datos no mienten, el aplastamiento que el edificio provoca sobre los músculos del cuerpo y la inmovilización que sufre la persona, la hacen entrar en un estado de shock, el cual es un sistema de supervivencia del cuerpo; en el momento que se es liberado de tal estado, la sangre comienza a fluir de nuevo y la sangre se envenena, lo cual quiere decir que tan sólo me daría tiempo de decir: "Gracias por haber hecho todo lo posible" Antes de morir en la ambulancia o camino a la ambulancia...

El jefe de Protección Civil añadía: "Sé que suena cruel y que suena inhumano, pero no lo es, en realidad es mucho más humano librarlos del dolor que los acoge y mantenerlos lo más estables y sedados posibles, antes de que finalmente mueran; cuando tienes a la victima de una catástrofe de esta magnitud, y tienes a dos heridos - una mujer con una fractura de fémur y a un hombre que acaba de ser rescatado de uno de los edificios, a la que llevas al hospital es a la mujer...; por eso cuando los paramédicos no suben con ellos a las ambulancias y dictan la nota negra, lo mejor es dejar que den la noticia del fallecimiento en el Hospital, debido a la presión de los medios y la presión que sufren los paramédicos por parte de las personas en el lugar y por supuesto por parte de los familiares... no es fácil tomar decisiones tan difíciles, pero es necesario hacerlas, porque lo que tardemos en tomar esas decisiones son momentos cruciales para poder salir a ayudar a otras personas..."

Mi jornada hacia la vida, Día 1036, Don´t pray... please ACT!!!

This is more of a, call it a relief to alleviate my own... disagreement, in relation to the spirituality hypocrisy...

After the earthquake here in México, I send the photos and pictures to a group of friends with who I used to share a form of "practice" around the native american philosophy. Their answered left me cold... "So bad... Let´s pray for our brothers... blessings..."

... Let´s pray...? Blessings?

Ok. Let me get this through... If your house had fallen or collapsed after the Earthquake, would you have wanted the military, the fireman, the paramedics and so on, to only PRAY for you?! No, you would have wanted them to ACT!! And act as quickly as possible to save you and your family as soon as they were able to, so that you could share another day with them... you would not have wanted them to PRAY, but ACT!! And you speak of "brotherhood"? Community? Love...?

That day, you kept going with your normal activities as if nothing happened... but it´s ok, because you had a thought about the victims of the earthquake, it is ok because you prayed for them...

THIS IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS FOR ME TO LEFT THE INIPI, IT WAS NOT PRACTICAL!!!

THAT´S WHY PEOPLE LIKE DESTENI COMPELS YOU TO FUCKING ACT!!! BECAUSE THEY ARE BASED ON THE LAW OF PRACTICALITY AND NOT JUST SOME BULLSHIT LOVE AND LIGHT LAW OF ATTRACTION!!!

DESTENI IS BASED ON THE LAW OF ACTION!!!

lunes, 18 de septiembre de 2017

Mi Jornada hacia la Vida, Día 1035, When Life is Set up for Failure


Today is an important day, because I will begin my social service at a little editorial, which is an area that I have wanted to get involved in for quite some time.

I have given a few listenings to this interview by Cerise, which actually has brought quite a point within me whenever it comes to new stuff, because something that I have had the tendency to do throughout my life is to, kind of "give up" before even starting whatever new job, whatever new experience in my life, what I mean by giving up is like kind of being "aware" that I will make mistakes, that nothing is going to be perfect in the first go (which is something quite realistic in a way). But if you kind of considerate this, what I am also saying is that it is "ok" to not give my best only because I am already going to make a mistake...

So, to keep a balance between this two points, what I want to commit myself to do today, on this important day, is to give my best in whatever it is that I am required to do, to always bring the best version of me and within that take my potential out, but remaining aware and also kind of patient with myself if I make a mistake, to be able to learn from it without being rude with me or judging me or whatever.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up in whatever new job or experience I walk into, over the idea that "as I am not going to make it perfect on the first go, I can also indulge in this point by not giving my best"

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up before I even started, instead of actually coming up with my best motivation and inspiration to give my best at all times, even if I make a mistake I also find the best possible way to come up with solutions instead of just saying "What does it matter? I was going to make mistakes anyway because it is my first day"

I can see how a tension moves within my head, like a form of pressure that forms like saying "Oh no, I am not able to make mistakes", which is actually not the case and within this

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that everything that I do today has to be perfect as if I am not allowed to make any mistake, instead of actually be kind with myself understanding and realizing that I am not going to make everything perfect in the first go, but that doesn´t means that I also have to be rude on me therefore

I commit myself to whenever I make a mistake, I ask for support or reference of how to do it in the right way, so that I am able to actually correct myself in whatever way that is required from me to get my job as expected

I commit myself to give the best of myself today, in whatever situation I might face, even if I make a mistake, I find the way to bring the best possible solution to it.


jueves, 14 de septiembre de 2017

Mi Jornada hacia la Vida, Día 1034, It is too late to forgive myself


Continuing with the blog that I wrote yesterday "The Impossible task and  Day 1032", I gave myself the opportunity to confront one of my friends with who I had a discussion where he said to me: "I feel disgusted from you"

I asked him: "why do you feel that way towards me?" And what he answered, actually showed me a very important part that I don´t usually tend to look at whenever "I react towards something or someone" - he said: "Man, you know that I tend to be very cynical, more for fun than for the apparent pretension of actually hurting someone, but in my radical "Honesty" I end up actually saying a lot of things that are not meant to be made personal, and I must tell you that you tend to take things very personally..."

He actually left me thinking for a while, and I looked again at the entire situation, the moment in which he said it - we were eating a piece of bread and a little piece of like a candy that I just love to eat, felt from the bread into the table, in the area where there was no plate and I took it with my fingers and I just ate it; one of our friends tends to look a lot into the manners of other people, cause he actually was educated in a way were, things like that are not supposed to be done; my other friend (who made the comment) knew that, and he used the opportunity to make a joke... that´s it... there was nothing to take personally there, but things like that, comments like that, are part of the things that used to become very much part of my own perception that I created in my mind of what apparently the people think of me, and that from my childhood, where I will hear comments every now and then whenever I made I mistake on something or whenever I did or say something that was not supposed to be done (of course from the educational backgrounds of my schoolmates), and there is always a person searching for an opportunity to make a joke, you know, that´s why I also created a very personal... hate, towards the people who try to make fun out of the people around them.

But I mean... it it really that serious? Should life be taken that seriously? That´s something that I definitely have to change... and yes, I definitely have to also look into my mannerism to prevent things like that...

Thanks for reading

Mi Jornada hacia la Vida, Día 1033, El proceso no es una creación de Ídolos






Personalmente, cuando veía a otras personas caminando el proceso, especialmente a aquellas que iniciaron prácticamente en la fundación de lo que hoy se conoce como Desteni; comencé a formarme una idea acerca de estas personas como en un sentido de "personalidad" y por consecuente, la resolución aspiracional a la que debía apuntar. Con los años he entendido que no sólo mi visión era incorrecta, sino que se encontraba primordialmente fundamentada en los mismos principios religiosos que me fueron inculcados desde la infancia, puesto que crecí en un hogar católico y gran parte de la ideología se fundamenta en y a partir de la espera de un "salvador" que venga a hacer "el proceso por nosotros...", tal es el reflejo de la creación de ídolos, que la posición del ídolo ocupa en la mente del creyente el principio rector de su responsabilidad por todo cuanto dice y hace.

La siguiente imagen es el retrato que realicé de Sunette Spies... insisto, el proceso no es una creación de ídolos, por lo que la siguiente representación no habla por Sunette o su proceso, fue simplemente la representación visual que realicé a a modo de retrato.


Y ahora me gustaría hablar un poco acerca del proceso artístico involucrado en la realización de esta obra en particular para explicar las rutas e ideas a partir de las cuales resolví realizar la ilustración de esta manera:

"Unicidad e Igualdad" como los principios base del proceso, no implican otra cosa más que el entendimiento de uno mismo, que deviene curiosamente en el entendimiento de nuestro entorno, no sólo como y a partir de medios empáticos para colocarnos en el lugar del otro y así entender un poco más de los procesos físicos y emocionales de otras personas, sino a partir de la educación fundamental que consta tomar lo mejor de toda y cada cosa que se pueda aprender y aplicarla de tal modo que pueda resolverse siempre en un sentido que pretenda o busque lo que es mejor para todos. En este sentido, resolví que la imagen de una persona, en este caso Sunette, al ser uno de los principales portavoz de este proceso, podía representarse en una manera donde la integración de su persona pudiese mezclarse con el todo, pues es así como vivimos este proceso, las siguientes son reflexiones personalísimas de mi proceso, y mi visión acerca del mismo. Espero sea de su agrado.


miércoles, 13 de septiembre de 2017

Mi Jornada hacia la Vida, Día 1032, Creating Agreements in your Relationship


By the moment I am not in a relationship, nevertheless, I can very much relate with this point; as I have shared before, I have been working with the pattern of "avoiding conflict", and what I can notice is that I have had this tendency to "agree with everything that is said or done" by the people around me to be able to avoid any discussion or further conflict that may come through; nevertheless of course this ends up creating more and more conflict within me, because obviously I end up making compromises or commitments that take a lot of my time and effort, leaving me with very little space for myself in other aspects of my personal life.

At the same time, I must say, I also found a great gift in always agreeing with other people, spite the fact that "I wasn´t able to find my self interests satisfied" or "I wasn´t able to see MY PART on the deal", and that was that, I began to get more and more involved with the people and their lifes, to understand the conflicts that they go through and within that I internalized very much of them to also see myself and see how much havoc and tantrum one can do for so little, in a way of saying it...



I very recently listened to this interview on EQAFE titled:

Self Love and Self Care - Atlanteans - Part 477

After listening to this interview (which I of course suggest you to also give it a try), I notice that the balance of both points has to start from myself, and that´s why I want to write a little bit of self forgiveness.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to try to avoid conflicts with the people by agreeing with everything and everyone around me, instead of finding the way to bringing out my points of view in a way where we all are able to find solutions and balances that satisfy to all the parts involved.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to always agree with the people around me just to not get in conflict with them, which then lead me to try to recluse myself as much as I was able to from the people around me, just to not have to face my fear of taking a stand and actually speaking for myself, and speaking the points in which I simply do not agree, because apparently, by getting away from the people like that I could have in mind that "they are there and will be there as long as I don´t get in conflicts with them"

I forgive myself that I didn´t accepted and allowed myself to see and realize that when I don´t speak and express whatever point I disagree with, I only create more conflict and havoc between me and the people around me, which then leads me to the point of trying to recluse myself from the people just to not keep feeling like that.

I forgive myself that I accepted and allowed myself to accumulate backchat within my mind towards the people in my world, instead of speaking up the points that I disagree with and within that, finding the way of expressing them to be able to manage any conflict that may emerge in the moment.

I commit myself to instead of creating conflicts within discussions, find the best way/words/communication to bring up the points in which I disagree with, to be able to come together to a solution that satisfy both parts

I commit myself to always find the way to deal with whatever conflict that may emerge in the best possible way, without creating any emotional or feeling experience towards it, so that I am able to always speak calmly without loosing the perspective, so that I am able to find it´s solution to the best possible conclusion

domingo, 10 de septiembre de 2017

Seeking Redemption - The Impossible Task





I was listening to this video made by Gian Roberts, as I was listening to it, several points began to emerge in relation to it.



Very recently in a discussion with a couple of friends, one of them told me, in like that "sincere, honest way" that I actually tend to provoke in him like this experience of disgust, and within that comment I also began to project into the past and see and search for the same comments that I received from my schoolmates in several occasions, which actually were comments that I used to take very personally, but I would actually internalize them and it would get me to a point were I will actually believe that, that I am a repulsive and nasty person, and within that I actually began to create several kind of ideas, thoughts, opinions about myself which also lead to a whole complex of inferiority in which I actually still tend to fall every now and then.



This kind of "convictions" lead me to the conclusion that for me to be able to "gain that respect", I had to also lead myself into situations that would allow me to get some "proof" pf my value... which literally took me to want to enter a militarized school, only to be able to show my worth, my value, my strength, and you know... that type of "male ego stuff".



But what is interesting, as it is mentioned within the video, is that actually, the more and more I found the need of proving such displays of male ego to other people, the more and more I would actually see myself running from the judgments that I actually created within myself in the moment that I accepted the comments and ideas of other people to define me; and what is more interesting, is that other people would actually be able to notice it, and the comments and critics would come up all over again in all types of forms, ways, ideas and... I mean you know where this is going...



I am still in the process of learning to respect and love myself unconditionally, and I know that for anyone who tries to walk such roads to fully accept oneself is not an easy road, but is it really more easy to live trying to hide yourself over whatever picture, idea, opinion you want others to believe, think and perceive of yourself? I don´t know, it is said that a "weak person" usually tends to imitate and use other elements, ideas, personalities or whatever it is able to find from the environment to try and define him/herself accordingly and within that find some peace and order of "being able to pertain" to I don´t know what... but as Bernard Poolman said:



"When you are born, you are not born with a language, you were told a language, and when you learn a specific language you begin to have thoughts in that language, this is more evident when you learn another language and you have thoughts on different languages, which should be sign that there is something like strange going on, because as you were not born with a language, you were told a language, therefore your thoughts are not your own, they come from someone else..."



I am not saying that we should forget and like not use any language at all, as if we had to create a new vocabulary to be able to create like a form of "authenticity", like the people who tries to change their name to be able to run away from their past or whatever... what I mean is that, at least that one is able to say that one has gone through his/her entire construct and has actually faced and worked with everything that exists within themselves to determine and create the best version of themselves, then that only means that they are also copies of the copy of the copy of the bullshit program of criticism that we have created and used generation after generation after generation...



I continue walking my own programs, and interestingly enough, what I have found is that even before being able to stop the criticism towards oneself, one has to first stop what one creates towards others... I have and still am a participant of such mind bullshit towards other people, and I am really tired of it, I am pointing out to be able to stop it completely, and I committed to that, because it is simply not cool to live worry, preoccupied or even depressed for what other people say, and its also not cool to that onto another...